Volume 27 • No 01 • 2004
ISSN 0742-468X • Since 1978
On-line Since 2000
You Know You’re in California
When …
- Your co–worker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.
- You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.
- You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.
- Your child’s 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.
- You can’t remember … is pot illegal?
- You’ve been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
- You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian
- You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.
- You can't remember … is pot illegal?
- A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.
- A low speed police pursuit will interrupt any TV broadcast.
- Gasoline costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
- A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don’t even notice.
- Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30am at Starbucks, wearing the baseball
cap and sunglasses, who looks like George Clooney really is George Clooney.
- Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
- Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into S & M, and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.
- You can't remember … is pot illegal?
- It’s barely sprinkling rain and there’s a report on every news station: “STORM WATCH 2004.“
- You have to leave the "big" company meeting early because Billy Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00pm Tae Bo class.
- You pass an elementary school playground and the children are busy with their cells or pagers.
- It’s barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.
- Hey! … Is Pot Illegal?
- You and your dog each have therapists
- The Terminator is your governor
- Pot. It’s legal, right?
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